A table speaks before you say anything. Is it waiting with menus closed, reading menus intently, waiting with the menus closed, finishing a conversation, or waiting for service with menus still closed? Being able to pause to observe the signals in a table approach helps you to approach tables in a more intuitive way and prevents you from approaching a table in the wrong place, time, or with the wrong comment.
Scan the whole table, not just one person. Are the menus open or closed? Empty glasses? Missing utensils in any setting? Is all the food served? Are the plates pushed up slightly or are people still eating? This information helps you decide your next step and avoid interrupting the table to check back when they are actually wanting another water refill or side plate, for instance, or maybe just some alone time. One common stumbling block for beginner servers is to get so caught up in the verbal component that the table is overlooked. New servers have been known to ask themselves, “What am I going to say next?” and miss the empty glass in front of a table’s edge, the guest with a question mark on the menu, a napkin on the floor. Polite language is great, but it’s even better when you read the cues that the table is sending and say what the table needs.
“Should I get another water?” makes more sense if I notice they’re thirsty, rather than the generic question I ask everyone. You can practice these steps in an empty restaurant and set up a few tables. Put a plate, glass, napkin, and cutlery on it, along with a menu. Change things about one aspect of your setup: remove a fork, a glass of water, a closed menu next to the plate, or a table with the plate pushed up slightly. Step back from the table and talk about what you see and decide what action you will take. You are not just training your speed; you’re training yourself on what to see first. You must approach the table from a safe distance; guests can get uncomfortable if you are too close, especially if they are having a private discussion or still working through menu options. Stand on the side of the table to give an approach that allows you to be seen easily but does not require you to enter guests’ space.
Make sure there are no obstructions and stand with good posture; you don’t need to cross in front of guests to retrieve items that someone across the table wants, so work around the table when it’s possible to add something to or remove something from their table. When you begin to get comfortable with reading a table’s cues, your service flow will settle into a more fluid state, and you will know whether to ask if everything’s okay, leave the plates, refill the water, or add a missing side dish without the need for guests to initiate.
The table isn’t waiting for you to come up with your answer; it’s waiting for you to come up with your action. The only thing you need to do is ask yourself before you approach that table, what is the table telling me? Your focus stays on guests and not your own anxiety. Your dining room will feel less overwhelming as you’ll know what to say at any given moment, and will get to know the cues every table gives you.